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The Life of a Super Organized Mum

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Time out

Now my mum is going to kill me for posting a time out photo of her most well behaved and treasured Grandson having a tantrum during time out but here it is- (sorry mum!!)
We don't often have to use time out for Flynn as he is generally able to stay within what is expected on him behavioral wise at home and we are all happy. Then there are the days where he will just not co-operate, throws tantrums will not listen and is just generally naughty. This was one of "those" days where he woke up grumpy. So the mean mum that I am after a few warnings for various behaviors a time out it was. We generally only have to do 2 minutes and he is usually willing to say sorry- but not this day. Flynn was feeling particularly stubborn and ended up there for 3 time outs and each time the 2 minutes was up he refused to say he was sorry. He did eventually give in though!!

So we use the Super Nanny Method.

1. 3 warnings
2. After 3 warning place the child in time out (a quiet corner works for us) explaining why they are sitting in a time out and for how long (1 minute per age)
3. After the designated time kneel down and explain again why the child was placed in the time out and then ask for an apology.

Saying sorry to mummy-finally !!!

And no less than 10 minutes later we were having a picnic afternoon tea outside= success : ) I am happy to use a technique that allows Flynn to understand what he has done wrong- have some time to think about it and apologize and then get on with the rest of the afternoon. It was like 2 different children and I love the after result !!

What works for you and disciplining your toddler at home?


4 Comments:

Blogger Brooke said...

At 2, Emily did not understand time out. So not much worked at that age beyond spotting what was coming and re-direct.

At nearly 5, we now have time outs and loss of the TV. All you have to do is turn off that TV and she will quickly change her tune.

I am lucky in that she HATES to disapoint me, so does try her best most days, but some days she just gets out of bed on the wrong side.

Great that he is understanding already. Hope it keeps working for you!

December 1, 2009 at 12:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Flynn has the same cross face as my tot, must be the age.

We're very similar. Accept the emotion but not the dislay, I'm sorry you're cross because your sister has the toy you wanted but you can't yell at her. Tell them what behaviour is acceptable, ask your sister if you can have a turn when she finishes.

If the tantrum continues, reminder. After that time out, which is sitting with his face to the wall.

We then remind him to play nicely, help him to apologise to whoever he has hurt with his tantrum and then give him a big hug and remind him we always love him, but don't love his yelling.

I do love the validate the emotion, though. It worked so well with my DD and now she'll tell people how she feels without losing her cool, most of the time.

Our oldest we used to send to time out, now I feel at times he bottles his emotions a bit because of it.

December 1, 2009 at 3:16 PM  
Anonymous Vickie Carstairs said...

You are right Jade in that Nanna is most upset to see her little Grandson in "time-out".
I do realise that sometimes it is needed.
I'm just so glad that now as Nanna I don't have to do time-out as I'm not Mum.
I also did something similar for behaviour punishment - took something off them that they really liked for a period of time.
Remember though it is always nice to reward good behaviour.
We often only focus on the bad and forget about the good.
Love you Jade,
Your MUM

December 1, 2009 at 11:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My son was very much the same at this age. I love his spirit - a sharp mind and persistence! It's a wonderful quality (for grown ups ;)

When my son was that age I realised I needed to make sure that he had a really good hearty laugh EVERY day! So I purposely watched for it as I played with him to pin point what really tickled his funny bones! I soon realized he liked it most when I would play a sort of peek a boo with his blanky 'hiding' Mommy as I sat in the comfy chair. I would call for him to find me and when he did I'd give him a second to be surprised by my reaction (a big smile and a little lurch forward) and then with him leading, a thrilling little chase to the couch (he would scramble up so quickly laughing and looking back at me, almost out of breath from excitement and laughing. Then there would be a gentle little capture and tickle! (really gentle, so he would not get too excited and get the hickups!). It worked wonders for his disposition and mood. We both laughed a good full laugh every time! It did wonders for me too!

You are a GREAT MOM! Your boys are lucky!

Kind regards,
TU

December 8, 2009 at 11:41 PM  

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